What Lack I Yet?

   This week has been a rough one. I'll be honest, there were many times where I felt completely out of my league, and almost paralyzed from the fear of everything I had on my to-do list. I have been so focused on everything BIG I had to get done, 5 tests, 2 essays, 8 quizzes, etc. And I let the most important things (prayer, scripture study, etc.) slip. I was NOT on the top of my spiritual game.
   Then Sunday hit. I went to Sacrament Meeting, maybe a little stressed, but mostly exhausted from my busy week. And one scripture that the speaker talked about really struck home with me.
   In Matthew 19, Jesus is talking with a particularly successful young man. This guy had it all, wealth, accomplishments, respect from others, and he was a very good follower of Christ. It would seem that he was about ready to be translated, he was so perfect. He even begged the question of Jesus, "What lack I yet?" (v. 20) (Pretty bold thing to ask.) Christ's response was "If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me." (v. 21) It is the young man's response that struck me the most. In verse 22 it says "But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful: for he had great possessions." HOW SAD IS THAT?
   Here is a person who has devoutly followed Christ, and has been greatly blessed for his obedience! He has been given great possessions, and yet, when Christ himself asks him to give it all up, he turned away sorrowful.
   Of course, this talk prompted me to ask internally, What lack I yet? What is it that I need to work on? What do I need to do in order to be closer to Christ? What is preventing me from reaching my spiritual potential? Of course, when we ask these things of Heavenly Father, He's going to let you know, and in return He expects you to act on what He has shown you. The list of things I lack is quite extensive, as I'm sure many people's are, and many of these things are very difficult to just 'give up'. When I realized my hesitation to be immediately obedient, I remembered the actions of the young man. I am sure, after working hard, and being so successful, giving up everything he owned would be very, very difficult to do. And his response was to disobey and turn away. I do not want that to be my response. It can't be my response.
   The scariest thing of all: I really relate to this young man. Not in the 'I'm perfect, what else could I possibly lack' way, but in the greatly blessed way. I know that I have been greatly blessed, in many, many ways. I am beyond grateful for everything that has been provided for me. I am not wealthy, but I am able to support myself. I am at BYU, the school of my dreams! I am studying something I am passionate about. I have a wonderful family that supports me in everything I dream up and do. There are so many different ways that I have been blessed by Heavenly Father. And with every blessing, greater obedience is expected.
   So. In an effort to not be like the young man, and be obedient, I have written down my list of ways that I need to improve. Of course I won't share it here, it's personal, but I know that if I can improve on these things, Heavenly Father will bless me even more. If I can work on these aspects, He will support me through my trials, and help me to accomplish the things that I need to. This will take time, sacrifice, effort, and many prayers, but I know I can do it. It reminds me of this scripture from Mosiah 4:27: "And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."
   Join me, and pray with the question "What lack I yet?". Heavenly Father will show you the ways in which you can improve, and I urge you to be obedient. Do not be like the young man that turned away. Instead, own up to your weaknesses, and through Christ, they can be made strengths.

Repetition Leads to Inspiration

I don't know how many of you follow the General Authorities on facebook, but I do, and they are awesome. I love seeing our Apostles and Prophet online, hanging out on social media! It makes me giggle sometimes. I follow David A. Bednar, and something he posted this week was really interesting to me.
He shared the following story:
     "My wife, Susan, and I have learned a remarkable revelatory lesson during my years of service in           the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.

      As we travel and serve together around the world, Susan records simple notes about the places we       visit, the people we meet, and the topics we teach. She has become adept at noticing in various             venues the things that are dissimilar in my explanations of the same gospel principles. Susan                 listens for the statements I have never used before, changes in an explanation, or refinements in           the answer to a question. Interestingly, the messages always are the same and always are                     different.

      We have learned to treasure the spiritual gems that are revealed through repetition. The distinctive       nuggets of inspiration and spiritual knowledge that flow into our minds and hearts as we repeatedly       teach and testify of gospel truths are the product of a line upon line and precept upon precept               pattern of revelation. Repetition is a vehicle through which the Holy Ghost can enlighten our minds,       influence our hearts, and enlarge our understanding."

First of all, I love that his wife makes those notes. I would think after hearing the same lessons and stories again and again for years, you would start to tune them out. Instead, she listens intently and notices the subtle differences. I had never stopped to consider how the small differences might amount to revelation and personal application. It just shows me that our Apostles are indeed inspired. Their messages are inspired and tailored to each audience, fine tuned by the Spirit they carry with them. How amazing is that! 

When you read John 15; 16, you begin to appreciate the Apostles even more. It says "Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain; that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you." Another scripture that I read this week that really testifies of the Apostles is in 3 Nephi 12:1 it says "And it came to pass that when Jesus had spoken these words unto Nephi, and to those who had been called, (now the number of them who had been called, and received power and authority to baptize, was twelve) and behold, he stretched forth his hand unto the multitude, and cried unto them, saying: Blessed are ye if ye shall give heed unto the words of these twelve whom I have chosen from among you to minister unto you, and to be your servants; and unto them I have given power that they may baptize you with water; and after that ye are baptized with water, behold, I will baptize you with fire and with the Holy Ghost; therefore blessed are ye if ye shall believe in me and be baptized, after that ye have seen me and know that I am." 

I love these scriptures because they show us the power of the Apostles, that they are indeed men chosen by Heavenly Father to minister to His children on Earth. They have been ordained, and have received power, to do the Lord's work. How amazingly blessed we are to live in an age where I can scroll through facebook and read the words of Apostles!!! Wow! 

Second reason I loved Elder Bednar's story: Repetition. I think a lot of times, we (and I mean me) get caught up in the repetition of our church meetings. Three hours, every Sunday, and once a month a Sunday where we are super hungry (or hangry, whichever type of faster you are...). It can be tedious, when approached incorrectly. I think this is one of the reasons the general authorities have been stressing the importance of keeping the Sabbath day holy. We need to make this day our escape-from-the-world day. I know for myself, other than church on Sunday, I don't do much to distinguish Sunday from any other day, other than the fact that I don't shop. I know that I need to become better at treating Sundays as my personal recharge day. 

I thought when I started the Book of Mormon again recently, that it would be the same from the last time I read it. I was so wrong. Even though I am rereading the same book, this time I am at a whole new stage in life, I am making big decisions and planning my future out, and I am seeing all new insights in the Book of Mormon. It is perfectly tailored to my needs, right now, at this point in my life. 

Basically, I think that we need repetition in this life. Sometimes it takes a knock to the head for us to finally understand something, or this time we hear it, it means something completely new to us! I have never valued repetition much before, but I understand and value it a whole lot more now. 

Studying: It makes all the difference.

Currently, I am on day 25 of a 90-day Book of Mormon reading challenge that was issued by my YSA Bishop. 25 days of reading the Book of Mormon, and I am beginning Mosiah. Throughout my whole life I have struggled to establish a daily scripture reading habit. No matter how much I tried, it never stuck with me. Even when I was in Young Women's and all I had to do to finish my medallion was finish the Book of Mormon, I still couldn't get into the habit! I did eventually finish, but only after three days of non-stop reading/listening to it. That's why I was hesitant when I decided to take two classes very heavy on scripture reading, and why I was concerned when we began this ward challenge.

25 days later, I can say that I have finally established the habit! Right after church the day our Bishop issued the challenge, I began the Book of Mormon anew with the intent to actually follow this challenge. We have a bookmark that tells us which chapters to read each night, and what to mark. I decided to only mark 1. Whenever a reference is made to Christ and 2. Personal revelations. I began reading, and I have kept up! Every night I read my challenge chapters, and then my assigned scriptures for class. And in 25 days, I can definitely feel the strength and peace that comes from this incredible book. Sure, I missed one or two days, but when I did, I picked right back up and caught myself up with the challenge. And on those days when I missed, I could tell by the way I was feeling about myself and about life, that I needed to read even more than before.

What have I learned from the Book of Mormon so far? That it is completely, undoubtedly, wholly true. I thought I had a testimony of the Book of Mormon before, and I am sure I did to an extent, but I have never actually studied these words before. I read them, for sure, but never studied them with a purpose. What I have found from these pages is peace of mind and resolve to do better. I have learned more about Christ's suffering and grace and patience. I have learned about my divine potential and what I have the ability to do with Heavenly Father's help. I have learned from the prophets that prayer is the surest way to a miracle, and that miracles can and do happen. I am only just to Mosiah, and I have learned all of these things.

In 2 Nephi 27:12, Nephi talks about a prohecy in which a book will be brought forth and shown to three witnesses by the power of God, and that these three witnesses will testify to truth of the book and the things therein. I want to add my witness to theirs. This is a true testament of Jesus Christ. The lessons taught within the pages of the Book of Mormon are meant for us, in this time to hear and take warning from. I know that as I continue to read and study and ponder the things in this book, I will be closer to Heavenly Father than ever before, and I will come to know Jesus Christ in a very personal way.

I love this book.